The Hyuga That Changed Destiny
by Lucency
Summary: I shook my head, avoiding his gaze. I promise not to let you die, is what I didn't say. [SI OC]
1. Light

The first thing I remember was how unbelievably _loud_ the wailing was.

I had no idea who was wailing like that, or _why,_ but I just _wanted it to stop._ I felt dazed, and weirdly sluggish, as if waking up from a deep sleep. I didn't even know where the sound came from. One second there was nothing. There was no sound wherever I was, and I wasn't even sure I _was_ anything a second ago. It was like all my senses had suddenly winked to life.

Now that I thought about it, and was suddenly able to form somewhat stable thoughts, that wasn't _exactly_ true. It felt sudden, but it really wasn't.

It had always been completely dark, and my hearing had been weak enough that I had convinced myself that it wasn't there at all.

The wailing got impossibly _louder_ , and I was suddenly aware of the presence next to me, the _who_ that was making a sound like that.

 _Baby,_ my mind whispered, because what other creature could make such a needy, desperate sound? I didn't think about the fact that there was a baby right next to me, I didn't even think about why, and I didn't think about who _I_ was. I only blindly reached a hand out, and accidentally smacked the baby in the face.

The wailing stopped for a few precious seconds, and I imagine it was only because the baby was surprised and hadn't expected to be smacked, even if it was by accident. I didn't register how small my hand felt against his or her face either. I heard the baby start to make crying noises again, having gotten over his or her initial surprise, and I _gently_ pushed my hand against the baby's cheek, trying to convey the concept of ' _shhhh'._

 _And it worked._ The baby's crying tapered to upset sniffling, and I could live with that. Then I felt his or her tiny fingers grab onto my hand, and my eyes snapped open- _oh that's why it was so dark_. I was instantly blinded by how unbearably _bright_ everything was, and I tried to turn away from the light, but my body wouldn't do what I wanted.

I blinked the spots out of eyes, and stared at… well everything was blurry, so I wasn't sure _what_ I was staring at, until my vision slowly started to clear. I blinked at the baby. My palm was squishing his cheek, and it turns out that _he_ hadn't stopped crying because _he_ understood me, but because _he_ was distracted trying to get my hand off his face.

I knew he was a _he_ , because I recognized him. I couldn't stop staring at his perfectly unmarked forehead or his unnaturally white, lavender-tinted eyes.

I stared at him. And then the fully gravity of my situation hit me with all the gentleness of a truck. The sluggishness disappeared. My eyes latched onto the bars of a _crib_ directly behind him, and then past him to the room that seemed _way bigger than it should've been._ Then I looked at my hand, ignoring the baby completely, because even realizing _who_ he was wasn't what was rapidly destroying my mind. It was what _I_ was. My hand was tiny, chubby, and was small enough to fit on his cheek without covering his whole face.

I was… I was a _baby_.

I started to shake. I broke into ragged sobs that my body was not prepared to handle. A _baby_ shouldn't be capable of sobbing the way I did. I cried so hard that I couldn't breathe.

The truck not only hit me, but it had stopped and backed up over my remains. I _remembered._

I remembered the car, that _tiny_ car that stood no chance against the _much bigger_ car that crashed into it. I remembered glancing out the passenger window, and the split second I had to watch the headlights illuminating my death speed closer as the driver slammed on the brakes way too late.

 _I died._

I choked on my tears, my hand falling limply to the crib bed. I didn't feel anything when I died, but that didn't make it any less traumatizing to relive. Neji... _Neji freaking Hy_ _ū_ _ga_ stared at me, tears welling up in his own eyes. I was scaring him.

Someone rushed into the room, and I was picked up. I cried even harder, which wasn't good since I already couldn't breathe. Two gentle fingers were pressed against the back of my neck, and I felt an odd sensation pulsing into my skin a second before I was forced into unconsciousness.

* * *

It was darker when I woke up, but nothing had changed.

I still died, and was reincarnated.

I was still a baby.

And to top it all off—I spared a glance at Neji, who was sleeping soundly next to me—I was the twin sister of Neji Hyūga, in a fictional universe. In _Naruto._ I glanced up at the ceiling. Just because I used to be a fan of the series did not mean I wanted to live it, whatever deity I'd offended.

I started crying again. I couldn't help it.

Something in front of the crib shifted, standing up, and I realized it wasn't a some _thing,_ but some _one._ Neji's— _not mine—_ dad. Hizashi Hyūga. How long had he been sitting there? He was dressed in black formal robes, but my eyes caught on the caged bird seal branded on his forehead.

Even though I didn't have one, it felt like a shackle, because I _would eventually get one._ I was a branch member. I had no right to blame him for that, but I still did. It was insanely easy to pin the blame on someone I didn't know or have a connection to. He reached around Neji, and picked me up. I almost threw a fit—until I noticed that he was inspecting me, and that the veins around his eyes were bulged.

 _The Byakugan._ But… even I, as a baby, could see the strain he was, _had been,_ putting on his eyes. The sob that had been building up died in my throat, and I simply stared at him. He was looking at my chakra network. Despite everything, I felt a sudden flood of shame, and like I was being horribly selfish. _He_ was the one who had come in earlier.

I didn't see him as my dad, but he saw _me_ as his daughter, and I had almost ended my second life prematurely earlier. How worried was he about me? How much had I scared him, making him think one of his children was about to die? Had he… been sitting there the whole time, making sure I wasn't about to choke to death by monitoring me while I slept?

He sighed, and then cradled me in his arms.

…I tried not to think about that too much, though I did notice that he didn't deactivate his byakugan.

I was confused, panicked, terrified and upset, but that didn't mean he had to be as miserable as I was.

He carried me out of the room, and fed me from a bottle—at least I was spared from having to drink from the… source. Only after he'd burped me, which I admit I fought against, did he deactivate his dojutsu.

It was only when he finally left did I cry as softly as I could manage at the unfairness of it all, added with the humiliation of being completely helpless, unable to do _anything._ The only one who I bothered with my crying was Neji. His eyes slowly opened, but he surprisingly didn't make a sound. He only looked at me.

I don't know why I did it—maybe I needed the comfort, or it was something I saw in his eyes—but I reached towards him and grabbed his finger. Neji's hand curled around mine and he squeezed my finger in response. I wanted to believe that it wasn't instinct, but that he'd done it on purpose to make me feel better.

That's what I convinced myself, anyway.

* * *

I was wrong to think that I wouldn't become attached to Hizashi.

I thought it would be easier to keep him at a distance since he was never with us during the day. I noticed that first when I woke up in the arms of a branch member. I knew she was from the branch house by the uncovered seal on her forehead. My eyes were attracted to it like a magnet.

After the initial shock wore off, I wailed. It was jolting waking up to someone unfamiliar, and my body was handling the situation the only way it knew how.

Even through my tears, it was obvious that she felt no attachment to me. She tried to soothe me by patting my back, but it felt stiff and distant, like a new babysitter still getting used to the job. She murmured soothing words, but I refused to be soothed.

I was still trying to accept and recovering from the fact that I was a _baby_ , and her treating me like one only made me cry harder.

When nothing else worked, she put me back down into the crib in a panic. Neji, who had been sleeping, was immediately startled awake by the loud wailing next to him. My cries faded a little once I saw the tears filling his own eyes, and instinctively put my hand on his cheek, pressing down until it was sufficiently squished.

He was distracted in an instant. It was as much of a comfort to him as it was becoming to me.

Hizashi took care of us during and after sunset.

He was the opposite of our babysitter. His every gaze at us was filled so much love and affection that I couldn't look at him for longer than a few seconds. He was expecting a normal Hyuga daughter, but he got me instead.

I don't know what I was expecting from him, but it wasn't to be presented with a Hizashi who held stuffed toys suspended over our crib and played with them to entertain us. Not one who stayed with us night after night and simply talked until his voice lulled us to sleep.

Despite my mental promise not to make him miserable, sometimes I couldn't stop myself from crying when he changed my diaper and _cleaned_ me, or when he _burped_ me after I was fed. It was all so _demeaning_ , but Hizashi would only hold me until I'd calmed down enough to get a hold of myself, or he would make ridiculous faces at me to make me laugh through my tears.

 _This_ was Hizashi Hyūga, the man who passed, _would pass,_ his resentment of the main house down to Neji?

* * *

Time passed by quickly.

There wasn't very much to do as a baby, and so I slept most of the time.

I learned that my new name was Yasu.

Even though I couldn't understand her, I did pick up on the fact that our babysitter only used that name when referring to me, and looked at me when she said it, like I should recognize it. It didn't take me long to make the connection.

Neji learned to crawl first, and I blame that on the fact that up until the moment I saw our babysitter put him on the floor, freeing him from our crib prison, I wasn't motivated to do much of anything. Though watching him crawl back and forth across the floor while I was stuck staring through the bars of the crib quickly changed this.

The second I was put on the floor for the first time to explore, I noticed how empty the room was. The floors were wood, and the walls were a simple white. There wasn't a picture in sight. I spotted a toy chest across the room, next to a changing table, but that was it. Neji's clothes were a simple combination of black and white, plain but still elegant. I imagined that I was wearing a similar outfit, and almost fell over trying to look.

Neji also learned to walk first.

I blame that on him being a genius. One day he took it upon himself to crawl over to me, and then use me as his personal chair to push himself to his feet. I protested loudly against this, but he had already accomplished his goal and lost interest in me, taking his first unsteady steps in the opposite direction. He stumbled towards Hizashi, who coughed to hide his smile even as his eyes shone with pride. I glared up at him, trying to mentally convey the question of ' _why didn't you stop him?'._ There was a perfectly reachable crib that he could've used instead of me, but I made sure to return the favor days later.

As I got a better grasp on the language, I learned that our babysitter's name was Natsu, and that Hizashi was always away during the day because of his duties leading the branch family.

* * *

Somewhere along the way, Hizashi became Father.

One night when Hizashi came into our room to check up on us I stood up as quickly as my body allowed and proudly screamed 'Father' at him, determined to be first at _something_. He stopped in his tracks, and in that same moment I realized what I had just said.

He scooped me up, beaming so much that he could have outshined the sun. I looked at him, the man who had shown me nothing but love and affection and I felt the sudden truth behind the word.

The girl I was before was dead, and I surprised myself when I realized how futile it had been trying to hold onto her and the life she had, when doing so only made it harder to live the life I had now.

The life where I was alive, and I had a family that loved me. Despite _knowing_ what would happen in the future none of it mattered right then.

I cried, unable to keep in the emotion I was feeling. I cried as I let the girl I used to be go, and equally at much just because I was happy.

He was my Father, and I loved him.

He seemed startled by my sudden change in mood, because he squished me against his shoulder, making shushing noises. My cries faded, finding a surprising amount of comfort in his hold. I hugged him back, as much as I could anyway.

Neji pulled himself up by the bars of our crib, shaking them in anger at being left out. Father quickly picked him up, and included him in the group hug.

I would have laughed if I could have. I loved them both.

* * *

After I turned one, I got to look at myself in a mirror.

Our birthday hadn't been very special. Natsu had given us a small bell to share that I had gotten bored of within two days, handed to Neji, and never saw again.

Well, I was tall enough that I could see into the bathroom mirror by using the step stool to climb onto the toilet, but even then, I could barely reach it. I grabbed a lock of black hair in a chubby fist and noted that I looked incredibly similar to my twin. The only difference between us was that I had slightly darker eyes than his, which wasn't saying much.

I blew out a breath.

"Yasu!"

I fell flat on my butt, almost falling off the toilet. I maneuvered around to face Neji. He was looking at me in what almost looked like exasperation. But even a one year old genius couldn't look like that… right?

I expertly climbed down, and gave no excuses.

Neji looked away from me, eyeing the toilet and the mirror as if wondering if he could get up there too.

I grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room before he could act on his thoughts. I was almost back to our room when I was picked up from behind, and dropped on a large pair of shoulders.

I laughed, watching as he bent down and grabbed Neji when he tried to toddle away, tickling him into submission. Only a shinobi could mercilessly tickle one child to death on the ground while keeping the other perfectly balanced on his shoulders.

Neji tried to say something, but it was lost within his laughter. He also tried to push Father's hands way from him, but it was no use.

"Yasu, do you think he's had enough?" Father asked seriously, pinning Neji to the floor with one hand and holding the other over him menacingly. Neji's fate was in my hands.

I leaned down to stare at Neji, considering the question. He squirmed, his eyes pleading. "Yes." I relented with a mock-serious sigh.

Father nodded once, let him go, picking him up. He was almost to the kitchen when there was a knock on the front door. The change was immediate. He stiffened, and Neji was lowered to the floor. My bare feet met the floor a second later, and he walked around us to answer the door. He instantly dropped into a low bow.

Neji and I followed suit. Whoever it was from the main house.

"We require your presence immediately," they said.

"Understood." Father almost sounded like a completely different person.

When the main house called for you, there was no saying no.

* * *

 **A/N:** Inspired by _many_ SI fics, but I'll mention Fatespinner by masqvia and Pinwheel Madness by Loeka.


	2. Fate

I picked up a blade of grass and tickled Neji's arm with it.

He twitched violently, doing his best to ignore me and maintain his composure. Watching him try not to squirm made me smile.

"Yasu," Father scolded me without looking.

I instantly dropped the blade, and went back to meditating.

Father brought us out to the backyard to teach us to meditate. It was supposed to help us learn to focus our chakra early, so that training with chakra and chakra points later would be easier, but I couldn't sit still for more than a few minutes.

I clasped my hands together and concentrated, focusing on the constant buzz of chakra circulating within my body, and managed to distract myself trying to manipulate it for almost a minute before I got bored again.

I opened my eyes, and discreetly reached down, quietly gathering a handful of grass. Then I threw it all at Neji.

He sneezed loudly as grass swept past his face and settled on his shoulders. He shot me the most unamused look possible, and then picked up his own handful of grass.

I raised my eyebrow in silent challenge, and could only blink away the grass on my eyelids. I picked a piece of grass out of my hair and held it between two fingers, inspecting it. Then I met his eyes. It was on.

Meditating was forgotten. Before I knew it, we were running around the small section of grass that hadn't been cleared out for the training area beyond it, chucking grass at each other.

Father sighed, but when I managed to sneak a glance at him while Neji was gathering more grass he was smiling warmly at us. I dodged before my twin could take advantage of my distraction.

We missed each other ninety-nine percent of the time.

Eventually I flopped down on the ground, out of breath, and a moment later Neji flopped down next to me.

I turned my head to look at him, and I treasured this moment. I wanted it to last forever. I wanted him to be this happy and playful forever, but I knew it wouldn't last, no matter how much I wanted it to.

My good mood faltered. I feared the future, for me and him. I abruptly grabbed his hand, and ignored his curious gaze.

 _I promise…_ I wrote on his palm, but then stopped. I considered finishing the sentence, but then decided against it, dropping his hand.

 _Promise what?_ He silently used a finger to write on my arm. It tickled, but I didn't stop him.

I shook my head, avoiding his gaze.

 _I promise not to let you die._ Is what I didn't say.

How could I tell a four-year-old that he was going to die in fourteen years?

* * *

I feared Hinata Hyūga's third birthday.

But I couldn't hide from it.

I knew the day had come when Natsu woke us up early and dressed us in the formal black robes that Father always wore, claiming that it was a special day for the future leader of the clan.

There was nothing I could do to stop this. All I could do was to cling to Neji's hand and try not to cry as we were ushered out of the house.

Father met us outside, and I saw heavy sadness in his eyes as he looked at us. Then he turned his gaze in the direction of the main house, and for a brief instant I saw burning resentment, and pure hatred. His fists clenched, and the sudden change in him shocked me. I was so _powerless._ I squeezed Neji's fingers until my hand hurt, accidentally drawing his attention. He noticed the look in Father's eyes, even if he didn't understand it yet, and his smiled disappeared.

The closer we got to the group of Hyūga gathered in the middle of the compound, the heavier each step forward felt.

Neji looked at me with concern when I started to lag behind, but I couldn't meet his still-innocent eyes. He didn't fully understand what this meant, and it was another thing that I couldn't tell him.

I swatted tears away before anyone could see, and followed Father as he led us to the front of the crowd. Hinata stood directly across from me, hiding behind her father, Hiashi Hyūga. Members of the main house surrounded her, while the branch house surrounded me and Neji.

"Happy birthday, Hinata." Father said formally, and everyone around us echoed him.

I tried to mimic the Hyūga around me and keep my expression carefully neutral.

Father bowed, and we all bowed with him.

"I think that young Neji and Yasu should join us in celebration of Hinata's birthday." Hiashi announced.

 _No._

"Of course." Father responded, straightening stiffly. I felt a trembling hand on my back, and then Neji and I were being gently pushed forward.

We stopped in front of Hiashi and gave him another quick bow. He nodded once and turned away, leading the way back to the main compound.

I swatted another renegade tear away with my free hand, hoping no one other than Neji had seen. Neji squeezed my hand, frowning at me. We followed Hiashi and a few of the elders into a small house. The group of Hyuga that had gathered dispersed behind us, returning to their daily activities. Hinata and her mother went a different way.

 _Please, no._

Hiashi stopped in the middle of the room, and beckoned us closer to him. "Kneel." He said once we were in front of him. Of course, he didn't explain what was about to happen. We knew, or at least were told the basics of what the caged bird seal was. I glanced at Neji.

We knelt.

Hiashi crouched down in front of Neji, and one of the elders stepped forward and came to a stop in front of me. The others were in a half-circle behind Hiashi, silently watching what was about to happen.

I wanted to cry.

Hiashi put his palm against Neji's forehead, and the elder mimicked the action for me.

There was a moment's pause, and I squeezed my eyes shut, waiting, trying to imagine what it would feel like. It was instant, like a knife was being shoved through my forehead. Heat wrapped around my head and seared my thoughts, turning my brain into mush. I couldn't hear anything past the screaming. I thought, but couldn't be sure if I was crying.

My vision went while as the pain spread down to my chest and arms. I would've said anything, done anything, to make it stop. Fainting was a small mercy.

A flash of pain woke me. I dug my nails into my hair, and opened my mouth to scream again, but nothing came out. My throat ached. The pain was gone in an instant, leaving me panting and crying. I pulled my knees up to my chest, shaking as I realized what just happened.

 _They were testing the seal._

I bawled like the four-year-old I physically was.

No one stopped me.

Eventually, I managed to push myself up and was too tired to be terrified when I found myself staring up at Hiashi. He was looking down at me with a tiny shred of… sympathy? I blinked once and it was gone, and I was mostly-sure I imagined it. My head felt strangely heavy as I looked around, and noticed that everyone was staring at me. I blinked again. They were _waiting_ for us to get a hold of ourselves.

Neji.

I glanced down. He was still curled on the ground, his hands pressed against his head. I wanted desperately to reach out and hug him, but the main house was watching our every move. I straightened, and stared at the door, not looking at anything or anyone. I felt a spark of resentment flare to life, and I realized just how easy it was to spiral down into it.

I counted to one-hundred and twenty before Neji stood next to me. I snuck a glance at him, and saw that the childish innocence was gone. I knew it would happen, but it was a different thing entirely to see it for myself. I had to look away or I would start crying again.

Hiashi looked over us, nodded once, and then went outside. He came back moments later, this time with Hinata. She kept a hand on his robe, practically pressing against his side. Hiashi pushed her forward once she was in front of us.

It was like I was hit with a tidal wave of bitterness. I tried to shove the feeling away, but I couldn't. I needed time to think about what just happened, to clear my head. I couldn't blame Hinata. It was her fault as much as it was mine for being born. Hinata didn't choose this.

But right then, at that very moment, I truly hated Hinata Hyūga.

Especially because we both knew why she had been brought here. In fact, Neji had figured it out first. He was already bowing. I quickly bent forward to join him, staring dully at the ground. My hair fell around my face, dripping with sweat, but I didn't dare move.

I counted to ten, and then slowly rose.

Hinata stared at us, but she looked lost, like she wasn't sure what she was supposed to say or do.

Hiashi shifted into our view, glanced over us, and then simply turned and left. I wondered if that meant we were supposed to follow him. I hesitated for a second, and then stepped forward. When no one stopped me, I walked around Hinata and left, Neji close behind me.

It was dark. We'd spent the entire day receiving the caged bird seal. The door opened before Hiashi could knock, and Father was there, staring at his brother. I quickly looked away from the anger in his eyes and slipped inside without a word.

I went straight to my room, and crawled into bed, curling up and facing the wall. I heard it as Neji climbed into the space behind me. We hadn't slept together since we outgrew the crib. He didn't make a sound, but I could feel how badly he was shaking.

I turned around and squeezed him, unable to hold it in anymore. I quietly cried into his shoulder. He shook harder, but he never cried.

I only looked up when I noticed a shadow in the doorway and saw Father for a second before he turned and walked away.

* * *

When I woke up Neji was gone.

I found him in the bathroom. He stood in the mirror, tying a bandage around his forehead. I blinked at him. "Are there any more?" I asked hoarsely.

Neji tied off the bandage, and then picked a roll up off the sink that I hadn't noticed before, silently holding it out to me. I took it and moved to stand next to him.

I couldn't take my eyes off the caged bird seal. I brushed the tip of my finger against it, but it was smooth, as if there wasn't anything there at all. I grit my teeth, fighting back tears, and quickly tied the bandage around it so I wouldn't have to look at it anymore.

The door closed, and I glanced over at Neji as he came back over to me. He wrote along my upper arm. Because it was an extremely slow way of communicating, we only used it when we didn't want anyone else to know what we were saying.

I first started writing on Neji when we were learning to write, after I ran out of paper to write/draw on. I hadn't meant for it to stick. At first, we couldn't understand each other at all.

 _Did you know what would happen?_

He didn't include the question mark but I assumed it was a question.

I was surprised when I shouldn't have been. Neji was considered a genius for a reason, and based on how badly I reacted the day before, it wasn't a stretch to guess that I somehow knew. I quickly tried to hide my reaction, but he'd already seen. It was pointless anyway, since I was basically an open book to Neji.

He hesitated. _Why didn't you tell me?_

I turned to face him, sighing. I responded along the length of his lower arm. _Would it have made any difference if I did?_

Neji didn't answer, because we both knew the answer was no.

* * *

 **A/N:** Thank you to everyone who followed/reviewed this story!


	3. Envy

I shot forward, aiming for a chakra point in Neji's shoulder. He easily shoved my hand aside, two of his own fingers aimed at a chakra point in my wrist.

Even though we weren't allowed to use chakra, getting hit would still slow me down and give him the upper hand. My eyes widened slightly, and I grabbed his wrist as I snapped out of my thoughts, throwing it to the side.

Neji's eyes narrowed, "You could have hit me there. Don't hold back."

We were both panting, standing across from each other in the middle of the training field. Natsu sat in the grass, refusing to take a side. She chose not to root for either of us. It was two days after Hinata's birthday. The day before Father suddenly decided to step up our training, and we spent the whole day learning basic stances and the proper way to strike.

We were trying to fight without using the byakugan, and failing. I only knew where two or three of his chakra points were with certainty, and I aimed for them with varying degrees of success.

Neither of us landed a hit yet, even though we were practicing for most of the day.

Neji shot forward this time, and I blocked his strike— _incorrectly,_ I noted as pain flared in my palm. I switched hands. Even though I was right handed, the pain would make my strikes weaker, and I needed to practice more with my left anyway.

Neji didn't stop. I tried to sidestep him, but I wasn't past enough. His palm clipped my shoulder, but I took advantage of his own momentum and quickly struck his side. He stumbled a little, and I took a quick step forward, aiming my palm at his chest. It would knock the wind out of him, and end the fight—I choked on my victory, feeling Neji's fingers digging painfully into my stomach.

I took a step back, and he used the exact same move on me that I had been about to use on him. I fell to the ground, coughing as I clutched my chest.

Neji towered over me. "You let your guard down when you thought you were going to win." His eyes were victorious.

Three days ago, Neji would have held back.

I savagely struck his ankle with two fingers. He yelped more in surprise than pain, backing away from me. I didn't hit anything important of course.

Neji hesitantly stepped closer, wary.

I held up my hands in submission. "You won."

"And then you struck me." Neji finished for me.

I smiled innocently and held out my hand.

Neji hesitated, and that fact alone bothered me, before helping me up. "Always keep your guard up," he reminded me.

* * *

A storm cloud had settled over Father, and when he was home, it enveloped our entire house. It seemed to get a little darker each time he looked at the bandages covering our seals, and there was nothing I could do about it.

There was no more playing while we meditated. Our nights were almost always spent gradually learning more advanced stances, and the location of chakra points that would not only shut down someone's chakra network, but damage an opponent internally.

"Byakugan." Neji and I said simultaneously. His expression was becoming increasingly grim, his mouth set in a firm no-nonsense line. My expression was just as serious.

His chakra network ignited within my vision, and the grass all around me gave off a faint blue hue. It was the third time I had used the byakugan, but it was still as breathtaking as the first time. His chakra network flared bright blue, and all three-hundred-sixty-one chakra point glowed stark white. I saw the tiniest of chakra threads wrapped around his heart, lungs, and every single one of his organs.

I could partially see half of a chakra network directly behind me, where Father was sitting on the grass watching us. The part of his chakra network that I could see shone brighter than Neji's, almost overflowing with chakra. It made Neji's—and mine—look extremely lacking. Partially, because he was half within my blind spot.

The blind spot wasn't what I thought it would be. It wasn't simply a spot where I couldn't see chakra, but a complete absence of it. I couldn't see _anything at all_ in my blind spot. The first time I used the byakugan I felt the constant need to turn in circles so I could see whatever was in my blind spot. I was supposed to be studying Neji's chakra network so I could memorize where each chakra point was and what it was connected to, but I couldn't help but he distracted by all the natural chakra flowing around me.

It filled each blade of grass, and even the tiniest of insects hidden within the grass had miniscule chakra networks that I could make out with impressive detail.

"No chakra," Father said.

I snapped to attention and Neji darted forward, aiming two fingers for a chakra point in my shoulder. As he neared, I remembered him telling me not to underestimate him. I batted his hand aside, but compared to his graceful movements I felt clumsy. I swept my leg out— _slow,_ I thought when his eyes flicked to my legs, seeing what I was going to do just as I started to do it. He looked on purpose, to show me the mistake I was making.

Neji was a natural at the Gentle Fist style. I stood no chance against him. I stopped mid-movement, and looked at a chakra point on his arm—and then my eyes widened at what I just did.

So, of course Neji had to strike me on that exact point on my own arm. The force of the blow stopped me for a half a second, and he used my distraction to sweep my feet out from under me.

I landed hard on my back, inhaling dust as pain flared down my spine. I winced, glancing at the red mark on my arm. If Father let us use chakra, my arm would be covered in red marks.

I sat up after a moment, and wordlessly held out my hand. Neji sighed, unamused by me not getting up myself, but still helped me up. I deactivated the byakugan and looked at Father, and saw that the storm cloud over him was darker than usual, crackling with lightning. He stared at both of us for a long moment before he closed his eyes, stood, and went inside without another word.

Dinners were quiet and solemn. Father only spoke to tell us to set the table, or to wash our hands, but he never spoke to us otherwise. It was unbearable. The day of the sealing had changed him, and the Father who smiled at us or went easy on us was gone, replaced by a silent stranger, who got angrier the more he watched us train. I couldn't stand it. I ate as fast as I could and excused myself to my room, where I stayed until it started all over again the next day.

* * *

I stood next to Neji on the grass, watching over Hinata as she trained.

It was the first time I saw her since the sealing.

We were in her expansive backyard, having been called by the main house early in the morning to officially start fulfilling our duties to the clan as Hinata's overseers/protectors.

Her instructor, Iroha, kept his forehead covered by a gray bandana.

As leader of the clan, Hiashi was even busier than Father during the day and mainly left Hinata's care and training to him. Hanabi had her own personal babysitter. He walked in a slow circle around the heiress, scrutinizing her every move as she repeatedly struck her palm out at the air in front of her, perfecting her strikes. He was brutal. He scolded her form constantly, which only got worse the longer she spent training and the more tired she became.

I could see how hard Hinata was trying, and how much her confidence in herself shattered with every scolding. He had to see it too.

Neji's expression was carefully blank.

I resisted the urge to frown.

 _None of this was fair._

It wasn't fair of Iroha to cruelly tear down Hinata because he couldn't hide his resentment of the main house.

It wasn't fair for any of us to be branded with the caged bird seal in the first place, and it especially wasn't fair when neither me or Neji even _tried_ to defend her.

I thought that I stopped resenting her, but I didn't understand until that moment that just because I understood the dangers of resenting the main house, and I _knew_ it wasn't Hinata's fault, it didn't make me blame Hinata any less.

It didn't make the memory of the sealing any less real

It didn't make the memory of being forced to bow to Hinata disappear.

So, I stayed on the sidelines and watched.

It wasn't my best moment.

Iroha only let Hinata stop when she was physically unable to train anymore. He just turned away from her and simply walked out of sight without a word.

We followed Hinata inside, and I was more than a little surprised to see Father kneeling across from Hiashi in the middle of the living room. His posture was tense and angry, but they both stopped talking the moment they sensed us coming.

Father looked up and his eyes immediately caught on Hinata. She stood in front of us, breathing hard. His eyes narrowed to angry slits. He didn't even seem to notice the ill will he started to radiate towards her.

Hiashi was on his feet in an instant.

Father fell to the ground with a thud half a second later, his nails digging into his head as he cried out in agony. The caged-bird seal glowed a dull green.

I went still, staring at him in a mix of shock and terror as he started screaming.

Hinata flinched, stumbling back as Neji ran forward. He dropped down next to Father, frantic and shaking as he leaned over him, but there wasn't anything he could do.

"Stop," I said when Hiashi didn't. I looked wildly at the Hyuga Head, starting towards him. "Stop!" I shouted. "Stop it! You can't-"

A shaking hand covered my mouth, and Neji shoved his free hand against the back of my head, forcing me into a clumsy bow. My eyes widened at the floor.

Father's screams tapered to whimpers as Hiashi deactivated the seal.

"You would do well to learn from Neji's example, Yasu." Even though his voice was cold, I could hear the approval for Neji's obedience.

I almost demanded to know why he stopped me, but I _knew._ He didn't want the same thing to happen to me that happened to Father.

"I hope that you remembered where your loyalties lie. I _will not_ give you a second chance." He aimed his words at Father, pausing for a second to let his words sink in before I heard his footsteps retreating as he left the room. A softer pair of footsteps followed him.

Neji let go.

I slowly straightened, feeling as numb as I had been a week ago. I don't remember much after that. I vaguely remember Neji grabbing my hand at some point, but I don't remember Father slowly leading us out of the main compound, like his entire body was being weighed down by the seal.

Neji locked himself in his room.

I refused dinner, feeling sick with a toxic mixture of burning anger at what happened and crushing despair when I realized just how little I changed anything. The tension between the main house and the branch house had been around long before I was born.

I collapsed face down on my bed, touching the tips of my fingers to the bandages around my forehead.

* * *

 **A/N:** Fair warning - There is no update schedule, and updates will be sporadic, at best.

If anyone's interested, read Stamping On Butterflies by kjate95.


	4. Sunshine

The Hyūga Affair arrived as subtly as a slap to the face.

Within half a week Father was dead, and he never even got the chance to say goodbye. Natsu woke us the moment she heard what happened, and brought us to the living room to break the news to us.

Neji stared at her in shock and disbelief in the silence that followed. "I don't understand," he said.

She tried to explain the tense situation between Kumo and Konoha in the simplest way possible, but Neji was already shaking his head, refusing to believe it.

I felt numb. Hinata's kidnapping and Father's death happened in a matter of _hours._ It hadn't happened with a bang of shouting and yelling in the middle of the night, or rushed footsteps outside as Hinata was looked for. It had all happened very quietly, behind closed doors, and with as little attention as possible.

"No." I said in denial, falling to my knees. I stared at the floor without seeing it. This wasn't supposed to happen. If there was anything that I was going to do my best to change, it was this _._ Something should have changed, because I was supposed to warn him before it happened.

 _Why hadn't I paid more attention? Why did this clan have to be so isolated from everything that I hadn't even realized what was going on?_

I bowed my head, tears blurring my vision. I felt like I failed him.

* * *

Father's funeral was held two days later.

The day after his death, the village mourned the loss of a powerful and respected shinobi. His comrades mourned the loss of a former friend and teammate.

The day after that, the Hyūga mourned. Hyūga gathered around the small slab that had been erected for him in the public cemetery, surrounded by dozens of other identical graves. The only difference was the name that was engraved on it. I stood next to Neji at the front. There was little grass around the grave, and the dirt was dried and light brown from years of being undisturbed, unlike the fresh dirt there should have been if there had been a body to bury. No one said anything about Neji's messily tied hair, or his extremely red eyes. Hiashi stood on the opposite side of the grave, his expression carefully unreadable. Hinata was directly next to him, her hands carefully folded in front of her. I quickly looked away. There were a few main house members around him who were attending out of respect, but most of the Hyūga surrounding the grave were from the branch house.

After a long moment of silence, Hiashi turned around completely to face everyone and started to talk about Father's sacrifice for the village without going into too much detail about what that sacrifice actually was. I stopped listening. I felt like it should have been raining. Instead, it was a perfectly clear, sunny day, as if it had any right to be when I wished it would downpour.

I quietly reached a hand out, threading my fingers through Neji's. He was still staring blankly at the grave, refusing to be seen as an embarrassment and lose control of himself in front of everyone. His hand was limp in mine, but he didn't pull away.

"He was a devoted and loving father-"

I squeezed Neji's hand tightly, almost painfully, trying to keep my mind clear and failing miserably. I'd never see him again. Despite the different person Father had become, he still put his work aside to eat dinner with us every day, and always watched us train whenever he had free time and now that he was gone-

I blinked water out of my eyes, trying hard not to cry, but that didn't stop tears from streaming down my cheeks.

Eventually, once there was nothing left to say, everyone slowly dispersed, and returned to the compound until Neji, Natsu and I were the only ones left. Natsu stayed slightly behind us, respectfully giving us space while we grieved, patiently waiting until we were ready to leave.

* * *

I sat in the middle of the floor of my bedroom, hands folded together in my lap as I focused on meditating. I had been doing it for what felt like hours, but was likely only one hour, since I woke up from a nightmare a little before sunrise, shaking and sweating. It had been of the caged bird sealing, except instead of being about me and Neji, faceless cloud ninja held Father down and forced the seal on him. There was no hope for sleeping after that.

I half did it because I didn't have anything to do while I was waiting for Natsu, and half because there wasn't anyone I could use to distract myself anymore. I was comfortable with aimlessly manipulating chakra, but I knew that I didn't have the control to use it in a real spar. If I used even the slightest bit more chakra then I should in my strikes, I could accidentally injure my opponent permanently, or even kill them.

I opened my eyes when I heard a door shutting, and quickly stood up, walking towards the front door. I didn't slow or look as I passed the door to Neji's room. He closed it on the day of Father's funeral, and hadn't come out since. At least, he didn't come out during the day. I could hear him moving around at night sometimes, after Natsu left for the day and I was supposed to be asleep. He ignored every single one of her attempts to get him to come out of his room day after day.

Natsu was half-way to the kitchen, most likely about to start on breakfast, but stopped when she saw me. "Good morning, Yasu-"

"Can I have ink?" I swiftly interrupted her, stopping feet away.

Natsu took a moment to blink at me in surprise. Dark circles were forming under her eyes, and her expression was almost always worried, even if she perfectly masked it most of the time. I saw it when the plates put out for Neji during each meal went untouched.

"And an inkbrush," I added.

She blinked again. "May I ask why?"

I hesitated, feeling my earlier boldness waning. "I want to draw." I said with less confidence. I needed to do something, _anything_ that would take my mind off Father and my nightmares.

Natsu turned completely to face me. "There may be some left in-" she inhaled sharply, realizing what she was about to say, and instead made herself smile. "Of course. I'll find some for you later, okay?"

I tried hard not to react. I knew what she was going to say. In Father's room. The door to his room was closed, and I knew that it was going to stay that way for a long time.

* * *

Minutes before she left, Natsu presented me with a semi-fresh bottle of ink, and a well-used inkbrush. She didn't say where she got them, but I knew that she'd gone into Father's room at some point while I wasn't paying attention. I pretended she didn't.

I watched Natsu leave—hesitating in the doorway as if she wanted to say something but ultimately deciding against it—and then retreated to my room. I climbed on my bed, pausing with the brush in one hand and the bottle in the other. I stared at the blank, dull wall in front of me, and realized that I didn't have any idea what I wanted to draw. A long moment of frowning and making faces at the wall passed before I decided to just go with something simple.

* * *

When I was finally finished, I was extremely proud of my creation. I drew a sunset. It stretched as far as I could reach, with the clan symbol drawn in solid black in the middle of the gray sun. I added rugged waves along the edge as the bottom of the sun disappeared below the horizon, along with tiny seashells dotted along the outline of the shore. Tall trees circled around the image, framing the scene. I even drew swirls of dark clouds above the sun. It all had taken almost the half the bottle. I climbed off the bed, feeling the lightest I had since the funeral.

Looking at the brush and then at the ink splattering my fingers, I had an idea. I went Neji's room. Sticking the brush in the ink as a placeholder, I took a deep breath and shoved open the door without knocking—accidentally leaving a dark handprint—and strode into the room. I planned to tell him all about my masterpiece, but the words withered and died when I saw the form tangled up in blankets on the bed.

I crept closer, barely able to see wild strands of his hair peeking out from the bundle. I hesitantly reached out with my cleaner hand, writing on a thinner layer around his legs, where he could probably feel it.

 _Neji?_

He yanked his leg away and shifted closer to the wall.

I froze with my finger in the air above my leg, hardening my resolve. I climbed onto the bed, stepping into the little space between his body and the wall. I was a second away from drawing something random that he would be stuck with until he was old enough to get his own, ink-free place in the compound when he spoke.

"What are you doing, Yasu?" He rasped, his voice barely audible.

"I'm going to draw," I told him. "I already made a masterpiece on my wall, but I won't draw on yours _only_ if you do it."

"Go away," he said tiredly.

I winced at his tone. The brush steadily dripped ink onto my foot, but I ignored it. "Fine," I grumbled. "I'll draw." I didn't move the brush any closer to the wall.

I could practically feel him weighing his options. Stay in bed, ignore me, and then live with the consequences, or give in to my demand.

Neji violently threw the blankets off and left the room without looking at me. I glanced down at the mess he left behind on the floor, and then grimaced at the splatter of ink that missed my foot and stained his bed. I half-turned when he came back a minute later, but froze when I saw the horror in his eyes. I felt more than a little offended by the time he climbed onto the bed. He confiscated the brush and ink from me.

"You didn't like it?" I frowned, pretending not to notice how red his eyes were.

Neji looked at me in alarm. "What _is_ that?"

"It's a sunset."

Neji looked doubtful.

"I drew clouds and everything!" I exclaimed, waving my arms back and forth.

"No," he spoke as if that was an undisputed fact. "You didn't."

"Okay," I crossed my arms. "Then you do it."

Neji looked at the brush like he really didn't want to.

"If you don't, I will."

His eyes widened, and he started to draw like his life depended on it. He painted squares, circles, and triangles of different sizes, but it quickly became repetitive to watch. It took his mind off his grief for a few minutes, but once he covered the space around his bed, he climbed down long enough to put the bottle down on his dresser. I saw his eyes start to darken. I quickly hopped off the bed and grabbed his hand, pulling him after me as I left the room.

"What-"

I tugged harder when he tried to plant his feet, dragging him into my room. I only let go when I had forced him onto the bed. I pointed at the very obvious sun. "That's the sun," I dropped down to my knees, gesturing to the mini beach. "And those are sandcastles."

Neji tilted his head, as if he could understand it better from a different angle.

I stabbed the symbol in the middle. "I even drew the clan symbol!"

Neji looked like he was trying hard not to squint at it. "I'm never letting you near a brush again," he said gravely.

* * *

 **A/N:** Hizashi's name means 'sunlight', or 'rays of the sun'.


	5. Doubt

**A/N:** I made a mistake a few chapters ago. Hanabi wasn't born until Hinata was five, but since I mentioned her on Hinata's birthday I'm making her two years older than she was in canon.

* * *

I fell back onto the grass bordering the outer edge of our backyard, out of breath. I wondered how Neji could possibly have this much stamina. I couldn't feel my arms, and my elbows barely kept me from collapsing back into the grass. Neji was standing a foot to my right, facing one of the few trees that separated our house from the one behind it. I watched his arm snap forward, and heard a solid _thunk_ as the kunai he'd been holding struck the center of the X carved into the left side of the tree.

X's were carved as far as Neji and I could reach along the left and right sides of the tree, with a kunai in the middle to separate them. The left side of the tree had deep indents in the center of each X from Neji's repeated perfect aim. He'd only missed once, when his aim had been an inch off from the center of the top X. The right side of the tree was… less impressive. The only X on my side to match Neji's was the one at eye level, while all the other X's had notches of missing bark all _near_ the center, disfiguring each X until they were unrecognizable. Only a few of my kunai hit what I was aiming at.

Neji bent down and picked up the kunai that I abandoned when I gave up. He turned it over in his hands for half a second before flicking his wrist towards a cluster of branches above any of the targets. I blinked as it disappeared, glancing curiously at Neji's back. He didn't move, and I looked up again when the kunai struck the ground off our property. My eyes widened at the leaf trapped on its point.

"Show-off." I teased him, though I was more than a little impressed.

I looked between the perfectly cut leaf to the off-center marks on my side of the tree we were sharing—which looked more and more dismal with each throw-but I didn't envy him. It was hard to feel jealous of Neji when he never gloated about his talent, or made me feel in any way inferior to him. I paused. If I didn't already know that Neji was meant to be a prodigy, and was going to be a genius at nearly everything shinobi-related, would I have grown up jealous of him? Could I have been that type of person? If everything I did was always overshadowed by what my twin accomplished, and I never knew why, was there even the smallest possibility that I would have ended up _bitter_?

I wanted to automatically think that the answer was no, but… I didn't know.

I frowned, suddenly not wanting to think about it anymore. I don't think I want to know the answer, or what it would say about me as a person.

I tilted my head back to look up at the sky, making myself think about something else. The sun was high in the sky above me, half-hidden by clouds. When we started training—or rather when Neji started training by himself with no intention of asking me to join and I did anyway—it had been around sunrise.

I looked at Neji again, seeing that he'd moved closer to the tree, tugging kunai out of the bark. I flopped backwards with a sigh, trying not the twitch at the way the grass tickled my bare skin. I frowned again. In a month, we would start the Academy, but that wasn't the part that worried me. It was what came after. In six years, we would graduate, and during that year, Neji's genin team would be held back from the chunin exams.

What were the chances that I would coincidentally be put on a team that would just happen to be held back from the exams that year too? I would have better luck trying to single-handedly fix things between the main house and the branch house.

If I had it my way, I would be put on the same team as Neji, but I knew why that wasn't even an option. Not only would the original Team Guy be ruined, but we would end up only protecting each other on missions, and unless our third member happened to be _really_ well-rounded, it was a death sentence.

What if I was sent out on a mission before or during the chunin exams, even if I managed to stay a genin, or worse, right before the invasion happened? What if by being born, I changed or added something that wasn't there in the original timeline? What if things don't happen like they should, and Neji got hurt, or is even killed before he's 'supposed' to die? Just thinking about it filled me with fear.

I rolled onto my side, wanting to bury my face in the grass. I don't know what to do. If I do take the chunin exams the year before Neji, should I fail on purpose and drag my future teammates down with me when they wouldn't deserve it? Should I fail my first year of the Academy on purpose, tarnishing the Hyūga name and making the whole clan look bad? I could almost imagine the backlash. It wouldn't matter that I was just a branch member.

 _A_ Hyūga _failing her_ first _year of the Academy? It was unheard of, blasphemous even,_ I thought mockingly, annoyed at my limited options.

Worst of all, would Neji forgive me for something like that?

I heard another loud _thunk_ as another kunai hit the tree. Ever since Natsu told us six months ago that we would be allowed to attend the Academy once the new semester started, Neji stopped trying to perfect every aspect of the Gentle Fist with and without the byakugan, and turned his attention to his accuracy with thrown weapons. He had been training every day to be more skilled than anyone in our future class, especially clan children.

I stared at his back for a few seconds, lost in thought, before I stood up. I winced at the painful tingle in my legs. I regretted laying down at all, since it made getting up again hurt so much more. I moved towards him, and didn't miss the way his throwing arm shook slightly as he threw another kunai. He missed the top X by an inch more than before, and his back tensed. He stepped up to the tree, about to pull all the kunai out and start over again when I put a hand on his shoulder. I quickly wrote down his arm before he could pull away.

 _Stop, Neji. You've trained enough._

Neji jerked a kunai out of the tree in response. I frowned, but refused to back down.

 _N-E-J-I._ I pressed my finger harder against his skin, emphasizing each letter.

Neji threw the kunai point-first into the grass with a huff and whirled around, plopping down and crossing his legs. "Are you happy, Yasu?"

"No," I sat down next to him, leaning back on my elbows. "I'll be happy when you learn to take a break once in a while."

Neji eyed me. "I take breaks when I need to."

I rolled my eyes at that. "If 'when you need to' you mean when I make you."

Neji leaned back against the base of the tree, and closed his eyes. He pretended to meditate since he didn't have a good response.

I resisted the urge to smile childishly at rendering him silent. Instead I peered up at the patches of blue sky I could see through the branches. I concentrated on the clouds, watching a vaguely house shaped ball of white fluff trail by. I saw another one that sort of looked like a cat, if I tilted my head a little. "You should watch the clouds with me. It's supposed to be relaxing," I tried.

"I don't see what you see," Neji said in as much acknowledgement as I was going to get at the idea of him cloud-watching, never opening his eyes.

I was spared from trying to think of something to convince him when backdoor opened, and I heard Natsu's quiet footsteps crunching the grass as she came closer. "Neji, Yasu, the main house has called for you to attend our young heiress' upcoming training session." She said stiffly, coming to a stop foot away.

I sat up, watching as Neji stood and walked past Natsu without a word. Her eyes followed him as he disappeared inside, but she didn't say anything. Natsu was only in her mid-twenties, but looked ten years older. Stress lines marred her forehead. Dark circles stretched under her eyes, and she there was a perpetually tired look in her eyes. Suddenly becoming the full-time guardian of two kids had taken its toll on her.

I was significantly politer than Neji. "I'm sorry for Neji's behavior," I said sincerely. Natsu was the one who kept us clothed and fed over the last two years, and didn't deserve to be ignored by Neji because he didn't want anyone to fill the role of our 'parent', even though she never tried to.

Natsu shot me a tiny smile and lightly ruffled my hair.

"He'll come around one day," she said, and the hope in her voice always stopped me from telling her the truth. Neji had two years to 'come around'. The truth was that he never would.

* * *

We were only watching over Hinata's training session with Iroha for half an hour when Hanabi's babysitter ran frantically out into the backyard. She was a few years younger than Natsu, and kept her dark brown hair tied in a neat ponytail. A dark blue headband was secured around her neck. Like Natsu, she wore a dark purple kimono, but unlike her, she didn't cover the seal on her forehead.

Iroha stopped his advance on Hinata to stare at her. Hinata instantly dropped to her hands and knees, shaking and panting heavily. I was sure she was thankful for the distraction.

"I can't find Hanabi!" Panic danced in her eyes as she looked around us for any sign of her.

Iroha stiffened like he'd been electrocuted, slowly turning to fully face her. His eyes were saucers. It almost looked like her words took the air out of his lungs. "She is _your_ responsibility! What do you _mean_ you can't find her?!" He demanded, stalking towards her.

I glanced uneasily at Neji, but his expression told me just how little he cared about this whole situation. I couldn't help but think of the Hyūga Affair, and felt my heart clench painfully at the thought that Hanabi had been kidnapped. If cloud ninja somehow infiltrated Konoha and taken her for the byakugan, it wouldn't be resolved peacefully this time.

The babysitter recoiled, backing away from him as he stood over her. "I searched all over the house, and within all of the rooms for her! She-She must have slipped out while I was cleaning up her toys!" She said meekly.

I… I would remember if Hanabi was kidnapped, wouldn't I? I never had a reason to question my knowledge of the future until now, but… what if my memory wasn't as trustworthy as I thought it was?

I felt someone nudging my arm, bringing me back to reality and snapping me out of my growing dread. I looked at Neji, surprised. He had inched almost imperceptibly closer, just enough to touch me with his elbow. His hands were still folded behind his back, as were mine, but he was looking at me out of the corner of his eye with the barest hint of concern.

"You two!" I blinked at Iroha. He faced us, his arms crossed tightly. "If the youngest heiress truly did leave on her own means, she could not have gone far. I'm giving both of you the task of searching for her."

I couldn't imagine the punishment they would face if Hiashi found out that Hanabi had gone missing after what happened with Hinata. I felt sorry for the babysitter, and _almost_ managed to feel sorry for Iroha. Neither of them mentioned the possibility that Hanabi was kidnapped.

A spark of defiance ignited in Neji's eyes, and I held my breath for an instant, afraid that he would refuse on the basis that Hanabi wasn't our problem or under our protection. Then the moment passed and Neji averted his gaze, staring hard at the ground as he begrudgingly went past them. I quickly caught up, but didn't speak until we were halfway through the house and I was sure we wouldn't be overheard.

"Why are we doing this? Why not someone better at tracking, or with a bigger range?" I murmured curiously.

Neji glanced at me. "Leaving the 'heiress' in our care would be irresponsible," he began, a trace of bitterness in his voice. "If that caretaker was sent after Hanabi and seen by the rest of the clan _without_ her, it wouldn't take long for them to think something happened."

 _Iroha doesn't want the clan to tell Hiashi about this,_ I realized, narrowing my eyes at a flower-patterned curtain. He was putting his own fear of what would happen to himself over Hanabi's safety.

"Won't they notice something's wrong anyway when we use the byakugan?" I asked as Neji slid open the front door.

He stopped just long enough to shoot me a half-curious, half-amused look. "We're not as old as you seem to think we are."

My eyes widened at that, and I could almost _feel_ my face redden. That was because most of the time, I didn't feel six.

We waited until we were slightly away from the house before using our dojutsu. Neji immediately started scanning the area around us for Hanabi's chakra, while I mainly focused on checking his blind spot. His range was farther than mine by a few feet, so he did most the tracking.

* * *

It only took minutes for Neji to find Hanabi hiding within a cluster of bushes a few houses down. I kept my back to him, in the middle of re-checking the area behind us when Neji suddenly grabbed my wrist and pulled me forward. He led me into the space between two houses, only letting go once I was standing in front of a quivering bush. I didn't need the byakugan to see the tiny bare foot sticking out of it. Neji quickly turned so I was looking at his back, signaling that he'd done what was asked of him and had no intention of helping coax a two-year-old out of a bush. That job was apparently left to me.

I deactivated the byakygan as I looked down at the bush again. "Hanabi?"

"Go away!" I could hear sniffling. "I don't want to go!"

I felt incredibly relieved that she _had_ just run away. "Why don't you want to go back?"

A second foot appeared, covered in dirt and tiny scratches. "I have to fight Hina, and I-I don't want to!" She cried. "I want to play like we used to! But we-we can't anymore!"

Neji crossed his arms. He turned further away to show how much he didn't care about what she was upset about. I actively ignored him.

"And-And I want to show Hina my toys, but I hafta train and learn to use the clan techniques," I only vaguely made out 'techniques' from the way she butchered the word. "And _he_ won't let me have toys anymore, and I have to fight Hina!" She crawled, crying, out of the bush, but stayed on her hands and knees. A few stray leaves were stuck in her hair, and her once pristine pink kimono was stained with dirt and grass.

"Maybe you can find someone else to play with," I said gently. I didn't want to lie and say that she would never have to fight Hinata when I _knew_ she would.

Hanabi sniffed loudly, clearly unconvinced.

"You can play with…" I trailed off, realizing that I didn't know the name of her babysitter, and I wasn't sure if she fully understood what a babysitter was yet. "You can hide your toys somewhere your Father won't find them." I guessed at the 'he' that she was talking about, knowing I was right when she shook her head back and forth.

"It won't work!"

I knelt, trying to think of other ways to get her to come with me. I had a feeling that trying to take her by force would only end in screaming and kicking, which would _definitely_ get the attention of those around us.

"Will you play with me?" Hanabi asked in a small voice, looking up at me with wide, hope-filled eyes.

I stilled. "I meant that you should play with your-"

"I can put my toys in your house so he won't find them!"

I sucked in sharply, feeling the situation rapidly spiraling in a direction I never meant it to. I held my hands up in a _hold on_ gesture. "I don't think that's a good idea," I managed. Hanabi coming over to our house to play? I didn't need to look at Neji to know that his answer was a firm _no_.

"You said to hide my toys!" She said, her face reddening in frustration.

I _did_ say that. "What I _meant_ was that you should hide them in your room, like under your bed or in your closet, or around the house." I reasoned.

She turned her face away, starting to sniffle again as she got more upset. "You're a liar!"

And there went any control I had over this situation.

"You told me to play with someone," Hanabi pronounced 'someone' slowly and carefully, all the while refusing to look at me. "And I want to play with you, but you're mean, and I can't play with anyone!" She started to wipe her cheeks with her sleeves, smearing dirt on her face.

"No." I said in response, but didn't know how to begin to explain to her why it was a bad idea. Other than Neji, she was from the main house, and I was from the branch house. I didn't think either side would approve.

"Yes!" She yelled back, and then shuffled around so that she was sitting with her back facing me. "Not going until Hina plays with me like she used to, since you're _mean_."

I shook my head, barely understanding how I let a two-year old get in control of the conversation.

This was taking too long. If we took too much longer, Iroha or the babysitter would fear that something really did happen to Hanabi and call in the shinobi. Taking her by force was looking more appealing by the minute, but then what would stop her from running away again?

"You-" I grimaced. _I'm sorry, Neji._ "You can play at my house if you come back _and_ promise to never ever run away again." I could practically hear the dirt crunching under Neji's sandals as he turned around. I felt the heat of the holes no doubt being burned into my back.

Hanabi spun around and looked up at me with wide eyes, her eyes bright. "Really?" She asked.

I nodded helplessly.

Hanabi's smile grew, and she quickly got up, skipping in happy circles around me while she waited for us to lead the way back. I straightened and hesitantly looked at Neji, only to wince. It was just as I thought. A non-Hyūga would have instantly burst into flames the second they met his glare.

I looked down at Hanabi and could only hope that she forgot.


	6. Firework

I stared down at the watery green surface of the tea that Natsu brewed, eyeing the steam slowly wafting up from the cup with a small frown. Even though it felt like I had been waiting for it to cool down for at least half an hour, the tea was still inexplicably burning hot. I was almost sure that the tea—aware of how much I liked it—was doing it on purpose to keep me from drinking it. I sighed and put my elbow on the table, leaning my cheek against my palm.

I was taking a somewhat voluntary break from weapon training/taijutsu practice with Neji. Well, Neji had been assaulting one tree with shuriken while I had been using another as kicking practice after he refused to spar with me. I didn't have the kind of focused attention he had. I couldn't stand in front of a tree for hours each day throwing kunai or shuriken at marked targets over and over again until I never missed.

After a while, Natsu had come out into the backyard and innocently announced that she just so happened to be making my favorite tea. I knew that it was her way of bribing me to stop training for a while, but I couldn't resist. I focused on the tea again, watching the surface ripple as I adjusted my elbow. Though her bribery was only for me. Neji liked Natsu's darker, odorless tea, while mine smelled faintly of spices, but Natsu didn't make her darker tea that often anymore. Lately, she hadn't been trying to get Neji to talk to her as much as she used to. Maybe she was trying a different approach and simply giving him more space, or maybe she'd just finally started to give up entirely.

I paused when I felt a hand on my head. "Don't look so upset with it, Yasu. It's only been two minutes, _at most,_ since you sat down," she sounded faintly amused. "Patience is an important trait for shinobi."

I barely heard her. I wanted to tell her not to give up on Neji, as if she hadn't already spent years trying to get through to him, as if Neji would ever acknowledge her. _As if._ I mentally sighed and thought about what she'd said, pushing Neji and Natsu's nonexistent relationship to the back of my mind. I couldn't force Neji to talk to her, and even if I could, Neji would probably only say something negative and/or condescending, which wasn't what I wanted.

"Yasu?" Natsu asked, a smidge of worry creeping into her voice.

 _You took too long._ I frowned more deeply at the tea, refusing to answer. I did this for many reasons, one being that Natsu didn't know what she was talking about. I _was_ being patient and it _was_ doing it on purpose. Another was that tea wasn't what I wanted to talk to Natsu about. Eventually I muttered something vague about 'the tea mocking me', and hoped that that was enough for Natsu.

It was, since she shook her head in amusement and moved her hand away. I heard her walk back into the small kitchen area. "I'm almost surprised that you didn't ask me how I made it again," she teased.

I didn't see why I would. The few times I had asked, she always shut me down with the 'it's a secret' line, which was more annoying with each use. I wondered what she thought I was going to do with it. _Maybe she's right,_ I mused. _If Natsu wasn't stuck watching over us, she could have easily had a successful tea shop. Maybe she has good reason to be afraid of a six-year-old stealing her recipe._

Three solid raps on the front door interrupted my thoughts. I stilled, hearing a clanking sound in the background as Natsu put something heavy down, and then her quiet footsteps as she went to answer. I closed my eyes. The tea was suddenly the last thing on my mind. I waited, inevitably, to hear the familiar monotone voice of the branch member on the other side of the door. ' _Our future heiress requires Yasu and Neji to oversee her current training-_

"Mistress Hanabi?" Natsu asked, unable to hide her shock.

My eyes snapped open. _Hanabi…?_ I swiveled around, but could only see Natu's back. Her posture was stiff, and her fingers twitched out of sight against the back of the door, as if she wasn't sure whether she should open it further or not.

"I brought Hanabi over so that she may play with your charges for a while," the babysitter explained.

I wondered how many strange looks they got from branch members on their way here.

Natsu didn't say anything for a long moment. "Does Master Hiashi know about this?" She asked just as reasonably, though her slightly higher-than-normal voice betrayed how anxious she was.

Hanabi spoke before the babysitter could answer. "May I come in?" She sounded so sweet that I _almost_ forgot about the way she manipulated me before.

"O-Of course," Natsu said quickly, stepping out of her way. Though what other answer was there? Say no and slam the door in Hanabi's face?

Hanabi came into view, clutching a faded, worn-looking gray rabbit tightly to her chest. She hesitantly looked around, her eyes lighting up the second she saw me. I stood up as she came closer, smiling with all the teeth she had. "I didn't run away again," she sounded proud. It took me a few seconds to remember the promise I made with her.

I forced a smile and snuck a quick glance at Natsu, who was having a quiet, serious-sounding conversation with the babysitter.

"Look!" Hanabi held her rabbit up. "I brought my toys too!" She turned the rabbit around to show me a hidden zipper on the back and waited until she was sure I was paying full attention before tugging it down. She stuffed most of her hand in it, and came out with a small, white and green stripped firecracker with wooden wheels on the bottom. "See!" She held it up higher, as if I couldn't see it.

I wasn't sure what to say. While Hanabi was three, both physically and mentally, I wasn't. Most normal six-year-olds would have let themselves be entertained by Hanabi, or at least indulged her, but… I didn't want to. Other than the one time, I had never had any real reason to interact with Hanabi. Was she even potty-trained?

I could only sigh when I heard the backdoor slide open, glancing over at Neji. He took half a step inside and immediately froze, his eyes narrowing at Hanabi.

Hanabi shot him a small, timid smile, completely oblivious to his dark look. Without a word Neji simply turned and went back outside. I frowned a little. That… could have gone worse. I jogged after him, since it _was_ my fault that she was here.

He hadn't gone back to train like I expected, but was just standing off to the side out of sight. I closed the door behind me, and the second I was close enough, he started writing along my arm.

 _Get rid of her._

He made kicking the youngest heiress out of our house sound so easy. _Not unless you help me,_ I wrote back to him.

Neji gave me a flat look in response, and I instantly realized what a mistake asking for his help was. He wouldn't try to be nice about convincing her to leave. He would crush Hanabi and her nonexistent dreams without remorse. I quickly revised my statement.

 _Not unless you come with me._

Neji looked at me like I was the cause of all the world's problems, but he didn't say no. I accepted that as a yes by default and went back inside. Neji reluctantly followed and sat against the wall next to the door, which was as close to Hanabi as he was willing to go.

Hanabi was sitting where I'd left her, entertaining herself. The rabbit was sitting in front of her, and she was using its paw to guide the firecracker around in aimless circles. At intervals known only to her, she made appropriate popping noises.

I looked at Neji, only to feel immediate apprehension when I saw that he was reconsidering Hanabi as if he might decide to 'help' after all.

Natsu was still busy engaging the babysitter. I crouched down in front of Hanabi, watching her launch the firecracker in the air right before she made an explosion sound. "Here!" She said with a wide smile, holding the firecracker suspended in the air in front of me.

I blinked at her, then at the firecracker. I shook my head. "Hanabi," I began slowly, still thinking of what I was going to say to convince her. "I don't think-"

"Take it!" Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, like she didn't understand why I wouldn't want a toy firecracker. I hesitated, and then did so she wouldn't keep waving the toy in my face. Then I stared down at it, not sure what I was supposed to do with it.

Satisfied, Hanabi turned her attention back to the rabbit, and pulled a small, hand-stitched doll out of it, along with a handful of stuffing. She quickly shoved the stuffing back in as the rabbit started to sag.

"I don't think that this is a good time to play," I said gently. "I was in the middle of practicing with-" I stopped the moment Hanabi looked up at me, looking so thoroughly crushed that I wondered if I was any better than Neji.

I stared down at the firecracker in my hand guiltily, and then put it on the ground, slowly rolling it towards her. Hanabi pushed it away from her and started to pull her knees up, tears welling in her eyes, up until the moment she saw me reaching for it. I righted it and rolled it towards her again. Hanabi's eyes widened in shock, and she stared up at me in disbelief for a few uncomfortable seconds before she slowly rolled it back to me.

 _I'll just play with her for half an hour, then I won't feel bad when I make up a better excuse to get her to leave,_ I decided, nudging it back to her.

I heard a long-suffering sigh behind me.

* * *

Three hours later, when Hanabi's babysitter finally said that it was time for her to head back to the main part of the compound before Master Hiashi returned, I couldn't believe how long I had been playing.

I was frozen holding the firecracker high up in the air, a second away from sending it crashing down into the small army of toys that Hanabi had produced from her worse for wear looking rabbit, and was surprised to realize that I was actually having _fun._

I lowered the firecracker to the ground and let Hanabi return it to her bottomless rabbit without noticing. I tried to think of the last time I had fun like this—without thought, without worry, without _anything—_ but I couldn't. I hadn't thought once about training, or the future. It had been so long since I had any _real_ fun that I didn't know that I was capable of it anymore.

 _When did I start thinking that a little fun was a bad thing?_ I had the sudden image of throwing grass at Neji when I was younger for the fun of it and felt a small sense of loss, like I was missing something that I used to think was important and hadn't even realized it until I was confronted with it.

Hanabi happily held her rabbit out to me with one hand, while the babysitter held the other. "You said I can put my toys here, 'member?"

I blinked at her and nodded numbly, taking the rabbit without really thinking about what I was doing. Hanabi beamed, turning away as she was led towards the door. I was still staring down at the rabbit when the door closed, which didn't feel as heavy as I thought it should have. Then I looked up at Neji, who I forgot about.

He had moved to sit on the opposite side of the table, and I was more than a little surprised to see that he was cradling a cup of tea. I stood up and saw that Natsu had brewed more, though there were two cups already in the sink, making me think that she made it more for the babysitter than for Neji. My twin made it a point to stare straight at me, letting me see the clear disdain and disapproval in his eyes. At the same time, he reluctantly sipped at the tea he was clearly pretending not to enjoy.

The irony of it all was not lost on me. I ducked my head so he couldn't see my sudden grin. My shoulders shook with barely contained laughter, until I couldn't hold it in anymore. I tilted my head back and burst out laughing.

Neji blinked. A small, confused frown made its way onto his face. When I didn't stop, or explain why I was laughing, he eyed me like he was sure I had lost my mind and was wondering if my sudden mental illness was contagious.

I only laughed harder.

* * *

 **A/N:** Hanabi's name means 'firework'.


	7. Fear

"There," Natsu said, adjusting the sash around my stomach. "Now look."

I opened my eyes, staring at my reflection in the bathroom mirror. I couldn't help but make a face at the brown kimono that Natsu all but forced me to wear. I didn't see the intricately stenciled black flowers circling my elbows and my waist, or feel the expensive material it was made from. All I could think was: _How am I supposed to spar in this?_

Yesterday, Natsu decided that my usual dark tank top and shorts look wasn't good enough for the Academy, and took it upon herself to find something she thought was 'more appropriate' for me to wear. She wouldn't even let me see it until I closed my eyes and promised to hold any judgement until I saw how I looked in the mirror.

I avoided looking at Natsu's reflection above mine. Even without looking, I could tell that she was smiling, happy that she could do this with one of us. I knew that if she saw what I was thinking, she would be let down. I tried to reconsider the kimono, pulling experimentally at the baggy sleeves. _I won't be able to move as fast as before, but I can hide a kunai in here-_

"Not everything has to be about making you a better shinobi, Yasu," Natsu said teasingly, her voice just a little _too light,_ masking the disappointment she felt. I jerked my eyes up guiltily and resisted the urge to grimace when I saw that her smile was gone.

I knew that, just like I knew that I should be grateful to Natsu, or rather, I should be _honored_ to receive a gift like this to properly represent the clan's image at the Academy. I frowned slightly as I looked at myself again and all my sarcastic thoughts vanished. Practically, I couldn't see the kimono, as pretty as it was, staying this clean once we started the physical side of the Academy. Even less once my future class was split up into sparring partners. I could already imagine the patched holes and dirt stains that wouldn't wash out.

I lowered my eyes to the sink. "No," I quietly gave her my verdict, but I didn't wait for a response. I didn't want to see her expression. I jumped off the stool that Natsu had commandeered from the kitchen so I could fully see myself, and ran out of the room without another word.

I stopped in my room just long enough to quickly take off the kimono and lay it as neatly as I could manage on my bed. Then I darted out and into Neji's room. I may have let her down, but I knew Natsu would come looking for me, and my room would be the first place she checked. I already knew that nothing in my closet would be good enough for her, and I didn't want to disappoint her more than I already had.

Even though Neji kept his door cautiously half-open most of the time, it was the only room in the house that Natsu wouldn't dare go into. He paused in the middle of tying a bandage around his forehead. He glanced briefly at me, only to immediately turn to face the wall when realized that I was only wearing only underclothes. I raided his closet. He didn't question what I was doing or why I needed the protection of his room, but maybe he just didn't want to be involved.

He was already full dressed, wearing a mini-version of what he would wear when he was on Team Guy, minus the jacket. Looking through his stuff I quickly noticed that, unfortunately, the only difference between his closet and mine was that his was shades lighter.

I sighed loudly to let Neji know that I wasn't at all impressed by what I saw, but he ignored me. He was pretending to be adjusting the bandages, even though they were perfectly tied. I stared hard at his back for a few more seconds before I turned back to the closet and settled with a cream shirt and dark pants. After digging around a bit more, I even found a dark sleeveless jacket that, by the dust that came off when I shook it, I was sure he didn't know he had.

"Are you done?" He asked, sounding just mildly exasperated.

 _You're not fooling anybody,_ I thought, resisting the urge to snicker. "Yes, Neji," I said graciously. "You can turn around."

Neji shot me a look that said that I was more insane than he already thought I was if I thought that he had faced the wall for my benefit. I couldn't hold back a smile as he walked out of the room with his head held high.

He could pretend to be 'above it all' all he wanted, but the facts were that he not only never questioned why I was wearing his clothes, but he also left me unsupervised in his room. His actions said more than his words ever could.

* * *

Natsu insisted on not only walking us all the way to the Academy, but also on making small, boxed lunches for us to take with us, though when she tried to give Neji his, he'd merely looked at it, then her in disdain and walked away.

I glanced down thoughtfully at my own lunchbox, and the white bow carefully tied around it, making it easier to carry. At the same time, I tried hard to ignore the nervousness I felt growing with each step away from the compound. Other than for Father's funeral, I had never gone outside of the compound, and even then, I was surrounded by members of the clan and hadn't paid any attention to my surroundings. Dark hair and white eyes were all I knew. It was familiar. It was safe. Despite _knowing_ that the Hyuga were as much a part of the village as every other clan, I couldn't help but feel like a tourist visiting a foreign land for the first time. Everything was so unfamiliar and different from everything I knew that I couldn't help but feel intimidated, and even a little scared.

I could only look up again when I started to hear the low buzz of conversation, and realized that we were finally away from the outskirts of the village, where the compound was, along with a few of the other big clans. Though I couldn't see any other clan past the dense ring of trees separating us from everyone else.

Identical looking rundown apartment buildings surrounded us. My eyes were drawn to copper curls of a woman leaving an apartment building to our left, but I quickly averted my gaze. I felt more uneasy than before. I knew that hair like that was common and even considered normal, but I still couldn't shake the feeling. I glanced to my right when I heard laughter, and saw a boy a few years older than me walking with a girl. He gestured wildly with his arms, and she laughed again. His eyes were bright green. Dislike clung to my lungs like thick, black tar, making it hard for me to breathe properly. I focused on my feet and refused to look up again as the sounds became louder.

I felt like I had been thrown in the deep end of a pool without a life jacket. I was overwhelmed. The eyes were too colorful; the hair was off. All the buildings looked haphazardly placed when compared to the orderliness of the clan houses. It was all so unorganized and I was drowning in all the noise and-

My head jerked up when I felt a hand on my shoulder, and stared up at Natsu with wide, surprised eyes. I realized I had stopped walking when I looked past her and saw Neji several feet away. Even though he stopped, he kept his back to us. Natsu's smile was knowing, and her eyes reassuring. 'It's okay' she mouthed, making sure that we wouldn't be overheard by anyone around us.

Natsu squeezed my shoulder as the panicky feeling in my chest started to fade, and I eventually managed to breathe out slowly, calming down. I still felt nervous, but being reminded that I wasn't as alone as I felt smothered the worst of it.

Once she saw that I was okay, Natsu's hand slid away and she looked past me. I followed her gaze to Neji. For a second I thought that everything wasn't getting to him like it had gotten to me—until I saw how deeply his hands were jammed into his pockets and how unnaturally straight his back was, like his shoulders were a shield between him and the rest of the world. He was affected by it by it as much as I was, he was just better at hiding it.

She sighed. I froze as Natsu started towards him. She stopped directly behind him, and I knew what she was going to do. I didn't know what _I_ should do. I wanted it to work. I wanted Natsu to comfort him like she comforted me. And while I didn't expect Neji to turn around and dramatically throw himself into her arms, instantly repairing their relationship, I wanted him to just let her. At the same time, I knew Neji, and I wanted to warn Natsu against trying to touch him because I didn't want her to be hurt by whatever he did or said.

Natsu stretched her hand out but stopped with her fingers hovering over his shoulder. Then the choice was taken out of both of our hands, because Neji noticed her right before she could touch him. He spun, quickly backing away from her hand. " _Don't_ touch me!" His voice was cold and angry, his eyes narrowed into slits. Natsu flinched, jerking her hand back like he'd burned her.

A few heads turned our way, attracted by the scene we were making, but they looked away just as quickly, deliberately staring away from us as if they would somehow be punished for discovering that the Hyuga could show emotions. Any other time I might have found the way an older man to my right faced the wall funny. He studiously inspected the paint as if it might peel off and fly away any second, but instead I could only manage a grimace. Everything outside of the three of us might as well not have existed.

 _This isn't what I wanted._ I took a small step forward, but there was nothing I could do to fix this. Neji had made the way he felt about her perfectly clear, and no amount of apologizing for him could change that. He hammered the final nail in the coffin of their relationship, and then set it on fire.

Natsu turned away without a word, busying herself with smoothing down the nonexistent wrinkles on her kimono. She didn't look at anything for a few long seconds, and then when she did finally look up, her expression was schooled into impassiveness. She moved past Neji without looking at him, but she also didn't look back me.

Neji crossed his arms, his head turned away from her. I frowned deeply at her back. I walked forward to stand next to Neji and was about to write on his shoulder and tell him that he should've given her a chance, but it was too late for that. I dropped my hand. He glanced at me, but I refused to meet his gaze and only jogged to catch up with Natsu.

After that, I did my best to ignore Neji.

* * *

Natsu stayed at the Academy only long enough for the entrance ceremony to start and then she quietly excused herself. I lost sight of her as the Hokage started to speak. He was standing at the very front of the crowd of this year's students with a half-circle of teachers standing behind him. Neji paid little attention to the Hokage. Instead, he looked around for any other notable clan kids worth his attention, or not-so-discreetly snuck glances at me. I kept my eyes on the Hokage as he spoke about the Will of Fire and our duty to the village, all the while refusing to so much as look in Neji's direction. I had never deliberately ignored him like this before and he clearly didn't like it.

Ignoring him turned out to have multiple purposes. Not only did it get under his skin, but it also stopped me from thinking too much about all the different hair and eye colors around me.

Once the Hokage finished his speech and the applause died down, the line of teachers behind him stepped forward. Each teacher called up a group of kids, and once they were all gathered in front of him or her, they were led inside the building. We were paired with the second to last teacher, who immediately told us to call her Rui-sensei.

"Alright everyone!" Rui-sensei clapped to get everyone's attention as the last kid joined our group, a boy with brown hair who did a dramatic double take at me and Neji. I pretended not to notice as Neji leveled him with the iciest of stares until he looked away uncomfortably.

"Follow me!"

* * *

 _This is a waste of time._

It was only minutes into our first class and Neji was already done with the Academy. I fought off a traitorous smile and carefully moved my arm as far away from him as I could, keeping my expression neutral. Rui-sensei was in the middle of writing out the classroom rules on the chalkboard, and I listened to her explain them in detail as if he wasn't sitting right next to me.

Neji huffed and sat back in his chair, crossing his arms. I managed to diligently listen for another thirty seconds as she told us the appropriate time to ask to go to the bathroom before I couldn't do it anymore. Even though I didn't completely agree with Neji's statement, I could admit that I was already bored. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat, resisting the sudden, strong urge to look longingly out the nearest window.

The way Rui-sensei spoke to us didn't help to make me anymore interested either. She talked down to us, and I couldn't help but dislike her for it. Some part of me knew that she was treating us exactly as we were. To her, we were little kids, barley even shinobi-in-training, but after spending my whole life in a clan that had never made me _feel_ like I was six as much as I did now, it was just condescending. Looking around at all the other kids hanging onto Rui-sensei's every word made me sink down in my chair a little. I felt like even more of an outsider.

I snuck a quick glance at Neji, only to blink when I saw that he was leaning forward, staring intensely down at something below us. I tried not to look like I was doing it on purpose as I followed his gaze down to the white and red fan three rows down. An Uchiha. Her back was as straight as a Hyūga's—and made me extremely aware of my own poor posture—and she was wearing their trademark dark, high-collared shirt. I studied her curiously for a few more seconds, but there wasn't much to see from the back. I looked back at Neji and saw that he was still staring. I was about to tease him for looking at her for so long when I abruptly remembered that I was ignoring him. I swallowed the words and quickly looked away, pretending to suddenly find an interest in the lunchboxes stacked neatly on the floor next to my foot when he glanced at me.

By lunch, Neji was in a bad mood. He sullenly followed me outside, and anyone who came within feet of him received a swift glare that sent them in the opposite direction. I still didn't look at him as I sat down underneath the shade of the building in a relatively empty corner of the playground. There were a few groups of older kids scattered all around, but most were as far away from the chaos in the middle as they could get. Three or four kids our age were trying to climb to the top of a big tree in the center, while others were playing games with cardboard shuriken and kunai.

I was in the middle of silently eating a rice ball—Neji had begrudgingly taken his lunch box and settled with glaring me into submission—when I heard a sharp cry. My first thought was that someone had fallen out of the tree. It was bound to happen sooner or later, but instead I saw a boy with red triangle markings on his cheeks fall dramatically to his knees, holding a cardboard kunai against his stomach. He gave one last dramatic death cry to his murderer standing above him before he tipped over and went still. His killer roared in victory and yanked the kunai out of his body before running back into the furious battle.

I watched as another boy went down under a barrage of kunai and shuriken, howling and shuddering as he slowly died. It looked both confusing—I wasn't sure how they knew who was bad and who was good as they ran around—but also really fun. My half-eaten rice ball was practically forgotten as one of the boys held up a kunai and proclaimed victory once half of them were 'dead'. Everyone else still standing cheered loudly enough to receive dirty looks and glares from those around them.

As the dead started to get up again, I had two options. I could do what I imagined Neji was doing in his head and mentally scoff at the obvious waste of everyone's time and energy. Then I could pretentiously eat the rest of my rice ball and pretend not to be secretly watching them. Or, I could ignore the fact that I was a Hyūga for a few minutes and just try to tap into my inner kid and play with them.

Decision made, I put my lunchbox down and stood up. I managed to take a single determined step forward before fear strangled the little courage I had. The bottom of my shoes was glued to the dirt. Staring at them as they separated into sides, I saw everything I spent the morning trying not to think about. I didn't know how I possibly thought that I could join that _chaos._ They were pushing and shoving violently at each other, shouting and stabbing wildly with their weapons. How could anyone fight like that? There was a bigger chance they would hit themselves or their allies than an enemy. What made me think that they would even let me join them?

I frowned. I resisted the urge to look around. It suddenly felt like everyone was staring at me, watching me, judging me for my emotions, for not being a proper Hyuga. I hunched my shoulders and turned away from the battle, walking quickly back inside, away from all the imaginary eyes. I stopped in the hallway once the door closed behind me. There was only a single teacher around, but she turned down another hallway and disappeared out of sight. The lack of people made it easier to think clearly. I felt both frustrated and strangely disappointed. _Way to not be a Hy_ _ū_ _ga._

I slid down against the wall and pulled my knees up to my chest. I was _so sure_ about my decision to go play with them. How could I let my stupid fear get to me _again_? I leaned forward until my forehead touched my knees and squeezed my legs. I don't know what I would have done next if Neji didn't sit down next to me. I didn't even hear him come inside. He didn't speak and I didn't move my eyes away from the floor. I ignored the sound of him shifting next to me, only to feel something tapping against my knee seconds later. I would've ignored it too, but the tap only came again and again until his stubbornness won out over mine.

I lifted my head and was about to rival his worst glare with one of my own when I saw that he was holding my half-eaten rice ball with the tips of his fingers. I faltered, staring at it in shock. I moved my stare up to him, but he wasn't looking at me. In fact, he seemed to be doing everything possible _not_ to meet my gaze. I looked back at the rice ball and slowly took it from him. Neji dropped his hand as if it he'd just let go of an explosive tag. He still wouldn't look at me. Even so, I smiled as I ate the rest of it.

Natsu was waiting for us at the end of the school day.

Neji spotted her first. We still weren't exactly on speaking terms, but our silence was companionable instead of frigid. He shoved his hands in his pockets and glared at the ground like it attacked him. "I apologize," he said stiffly once we were close enough to be heard. I whipped my head around to stare at him in shock, but his eyes were dark and unreadable. "For my behavior earlier," he forced the words out through his teeth.

Natsu only blinked down at him, her eyes wide. Neji turned away without waiting for a response, frowning at me. "Happy?"

I looked up at Natsu, and saw that even through her surprise she was looking at him with a new warmth in her eyes. "Yes," I grinned at him. "Yes I am."


	8. Intent - Part 1

My first three weeks at the Academy taught me three things.

One, I underestimated how boring the Academy would be.

After suffering through weeks of hiragana worksheets and basic addition and subtraction exercises, I couldn't help but agree with Neji. The more assignments handed out that forced me to separate signs into vowels and consonants or asked me to write out the difference between nouns and adjectives, the more sinister Rui-sensei's encouraging smiles seemed when she looked my way, as if she knew just how much I was suffering but had some sort of secret vendetta against me. I suspected that she fell in love with a Hyūga during her own time in the Academy, and when he shot her down she swore to enact vengeance on the future generations of my clan through the hiragana alphabet.

I spent more time in class drawing kunai, shuriken or random animals from another world onto Neji's lower arm with my finger, until he got annoyed enough to move out of reach, than paying attention to Rui-sensei's lectures. They were just as boring as the work given out and impossibly more lifeless. I don't think I would be able to tell the difference if she stood in the middle of the room with a clipboard held up to her face the entire time, reading off it.

Two, our first endurance test made me realize just how little stamina I had.

Sure, I can hit the dead center of whatever I aimed at over ninety percent of the time, but can I outrun most of the other clan kids? The answer is a firm no.

The test was only eight laps, but I severely overestimated how much stamina throwing weapons at trees all day or practicing the gentle fist gave me. Of the three other major clans represented in our class, only Shiori Aburame wasn't able to get in front of me. By the end of it I was left with my hands on my knees, quietly gasping like I had spent the last several minutes drowning. My body didn't care for the inner clan pride I tried to summon to make myself stand up straight. I was almost able to imagine Fu Yamanaka and Harumi Uchiha standing off to the side exchanging glances in secret, wondering if I was really a full-blooded Hyūga.

Harumi finished first, despite Neji's best effort—he wasn't stopped by something as small as 'bodily limitation'. Though when Rui-sensei caught him glaring at her she claimed repeatedly that it was only a test and places didn't matter yet. He stayed ahead of Fu on principle alone, but even his pride was no match for the Uchiha.

Once I managed to force my body to do what I wanted I saw that Harumi was calmly standing off to the side with her hands in her pockets, eyeing the track like we hadn't even started yet. Neji pretended to be just as unaffected and aloof, and I pretended not to notice the way his shirt clung suspiciously to his back when Rui-sensei herded us back inside. Only a handful of civilians and kids from minor clans managed to finish. Three of the civilians who gave up after half a lap dropped out entirely.

Three, I was cursed to be anti-social. It was hard to make friends when more than half of the class was intimidated by my eyes and the fire emblem on my shoulder. It didn't help that the only other person who was treated the same way would sooner throw a fireball at me than try to be friendly.

Or maybe those were just my favorite excuses for why I didn't try to make any friends past my failed attempt on the first day. It was easy to blame Neji and his otherworldly ability to scare anyone away who came within feet of him with a single look. Most of the time, he didn't even need to break out one of his signature glares. I could blame it on the inner Hyūga in me and claim that I couldn't help but see civilian-born kids as just that. Civilians. I didn't think we would have anything in common. It was even easier to blame The Fear.

It wasn't hard to avoid being afraid if I stayed away from the people that caused it. I had mostly gotten over it. I didn't feel uneasy around blue eyes or blond hair anymore, but there was still the sense of relief that I always felt when I stepped back into the compound. No matter how hard I pushed it down or fought against it, I felt like I didn't belong out here with the rest of Konoha.

 _I don't need them,_ I reasoned as I did exactly what I said I wouldn't and watched the small crowd around the tree in the middle. My eyes trailed up to three boys racing each other to the top—the Inuzuka from the first day taking to the challenge like a duck to water—and to the two others several branches down. I already had someone who I sat with and talked to every day. Someone who knew me as well as I knew him.

It was enough, or should've been, but the lingering tightness in my chest said everything I wouldn't admit to myself. I looked away from them, down at the half-eaten fish shaped snacks in my lap.

* * *

I tapped the flat end of a small rock thoughtfully against my chin, deciding where I should put it. I could add it to the pile making up the clan symbol in the middle, but I already used too many to make it as close to the flame on my shoulder as possible, leaving the protective ring of rocks around it less of a 'circle' and more finger-nailed shaped. Decision made, I added the rock to the top half of the ring, though it didn't make it look any more circle-y.

I was bored.

I resisted the urge to throw myself back into the grass, or to poke Neji until he squirmed away or berated me. Whichever came first. Though, if he ever stopped meditating long enough to see what I'd done, I doubt he would appreciate all the hard work I put into making it. I could already imagine the disturbed look in his eyes when I told him what it was supposed to be. I bet he'd try to ban me from ever using rocks again too.

Sniffing, because obviously my art was too complex for normal eyes to understand, I glanced over at him. He was completely motionless, his legs crossed tightly beneath him and his back ramrod straight. If a Hyūga was our teacher, he would have shed a prideful tear at the sight of him. I wanted to scoff at the thought.

 _It's not like it matters anyway._ I stared down at the clan symbol, shoving down the sliver of resentment that refused to let me be above it. I thought of the civilians in our class, and how they weren't nearly as stealthy as they thought they were when they snuck glances at my forehead when they thought I wasn't looking.

It didn't bother me. Neither did the look we got from an upperclassman after class the day after we started the Academy, as if he was surprised that we lowly branch-members had been allowed to enter at all. I never let myself wonder whether he still would've turned his nose up at us if I hadn't stopped Neji from lunging at him—or the chance that he knew how to activate the curse seal, and what _I_ would've done if I saw Neji on the ground screaming. Not even a little.

Bitterness? Jealously? Pft, not me.

I shifted restlessly, desperately wanting a distraction from all the negative thoughts swirling around in my head. I only noticed Tatsuo standing above me when he loudly cleared his throat. I blinked up at him, though his eyes were on the symbol. It wasn't until I looked down that I saw that my fingers were digging into the dirt. I quickly moved my hand behind my back, but I was sure he already saw. His eyes lingered on the symbol long enough to make me uncomfortable, and I couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking.

Somehow, I had the feeling that an outsider's opinion on it would hurt way more than Neji's.

Luckily, Tatsuo didn't comment on it. He lost interest and moved on to stare at Neji for a few seconds, and then he turned those brown orbs onto me. "Hey, so, which one of you is Neji?"

I glanced at my twin, though I couldn't be sure if he even heard him. I couldn't say I was surprised by the question. Tatsuo had a grudge against Neji. Last week, when Rui-sensei finally moved on from correcting stances and showing everyone how to throw a proper punch without injuring themselves, she made the mistake of trying to include us in taijustsu class.

Everyone from a major clan was exempt from participating in the 'teaching' part of taijutsu class, since it would only get in the way of the style we were already being taught to fight in. Maybe she knew how bored we were, and was trying to give us something to do. Nothing went wrong—at first. Rui-sensei chose to test Shiori against the beginners first, but there wasn't any way anything _could_ have gone wrong when her bugs made it so that her opponent couldn't get close enough to touch her. It didn't prove anything, but Rui-sensei agreed to disagree because the very next day she made Fu join her lesson.

The Yamanaka went easy on his opponent, and even went so far as to offer advice every time they were knocked down. So, on the third day of Rui-sensei's experiment, it was our turn. It was really only bad luck that Tatsuo went up against Neji. He didn't know what it meant to 'hold back'. It went about as well as I expected it to, as in he sent Tatsuo to the infirmary. Rui-sensei must have cancelled her experiment immediately after that, because the Uchiha was never asked to join the next class.

I leaned to the side so I could look around Tatuso's legs, and saw that everyone else had already split into sparring partners. Everyone except Rock Lee. The first time we met, I didn't recognize him. The only thing he had in common with the person he would be was his name. This Lee blended into the background, and he was easy to miss if I wasn't specifically looking for him. That…wasn't who he was. Rock Lee and 'easy to miss' didn't belong in the same sentence. It was only when he introduced himself after our spar—which was cut short when Rui-sensei intervened to save the rest of the class from me after Neji destroyed Tatuso—did it click.

I refocused on Tatuso. "What about him? He doesn't have anyone to practice with."

Even though we both knew who I was talking about, Tatsuo still turned around to look. Rock Lee hovered around Rui-sensei as she tried to find him a partner, and I had to look away when I saw how sad his eyes looked.

"Yeah, well. No one wants to be stuck with dead-last," he shrugged. "It's not like I'll get any better training with him, anyway."

I stared at him. _If you knew what I do about him, you wouldn't think that way._

Tatsuo ran a hand through his brown hair, sighing as he accidentally tugged on the black band keeping his ponytail in place. "Why do I have to be the one to do it? Why can't anyone else? Why can't _you_?"

I wanted to say that I _did_ train with him before, and how Tatsuo might not have remembered because of how busy he was eating dirt, but I swallowed the words. That was in the past. It wasn't an excuse for why I couldn't train with him now. I suspect that Rui-sensei might use lethal force if I got within feet of him, anyway. I stood without answering, brushing dirt off my pants.

"I'm Neji," I didn't look up as I said it, but out of the corner of my eye I saw Neji's eyes snap open. The look he gave me asked me what, exactly, did I think I was doing. I bit down on my tongue to stifle the laugh bubbling up, keeping my expression carefully neutral.

When I trusted myself not to grin the second I looked up—Neji didn't grin—I saw that Tatsuo was squinting down at my twin. He didn't look like he believed me, but since he didn't have a way to prove me wrong he eventually nodded and turned away.

I took half a second to stick my tongue out at Neji and he leaned away, betrayal shining in his eyes. I quickly spun away before I broke character, following Tatsuo. He didn't go far. He only moved enough to put space between us and Neji so he wouldn't get caught in the crossfire. I briefly met Rui-sensei's gaze over Tatsuo's shoulder, and barely caught the flash of alarm as she realized what I was doing before I moved to stand across from him.

I tasted blood from how hard I was biting down on my tongue. I almost expected Tatsuo to charge at me, like he did with Neji, but he apparently wasn't going to make the same mistake twice because he kept his distance. His eyes were wary as he looked me over. Despite my best effort, a ghost of a smile broke through. I knew what he was doing. He was looking for a weakness, or some advantage he had over me. He was almost a head taller, and maybe if he had more experience, his longer arms might give him the upper hand.

I held my right hand up and waited. Tatsuo's response was to put both hands in his pockets. We stared at each other, waiting for the other to make the first move. The flash of metal between his fingertips was my only warning before he threw it at me. My eyes widened. I stepped out of the way reflexively, and watched the kunai sail off into the grass behind me. His grip on it had been clumsy at best, and his aim even worse. He might have missed even if I didn't move, but I didn't miss the intent in his eyes.

I had been training ever since I could walk, but I never fought with the intent to kill. _Neji_ didn't fight with the intent to kill. If his intent had been to kill Tatsuo then he would have used chakra in his strikes. What if I hadn't been fast enough to dodge it? What if his aim was a little better?

It took Tatsuo's fist to remind me that I was in the middle of a fight. I jerked back a second before it would have connected with my cheek, and my eyes flicked down to his chest. He left his middle unprotected, and it would only take a single chakra-fueled strike to make sure he didn't get back up again. The rational part of me realized that the kunai was only a distraction, and Tatsuo likely counted on me to dodge it, but it was smothered underneath the rest of me screaming 'a-six-year-old-just-tried-to-kill-me'.

I ducked under another wild swung and the thought of hitting the chakra point in his knee flitted in and out of my head, but I was mostly on autopilot. What had he been aiming for? My neck? The throw had been too high for my heart, or anything below that. Who decided it was a good idea to give someone who didn't know what they were doing a kunai?

It was only when I auto-blocked a kick with my arm and saw Tatuso's eyes narrow did I think _oh, right, maybe I should fight back._ I was supposed to be trying—failing—to imitate Neji after all. It helped that I didn't miss the way his eyes flicked around every time I took a step back, searching for the lost kunai.

I didn't dodge his next punch. Instead I shoved his hand away and rewarded the effort with two quick strikes to the pressure points in his upper arm. Tatsuo hissed as his arm went limp and backed out of reach. He stared at me for a few moments before he shook his head.

"You're the other one, aren't you?" He paused, rubbing his shoulder. "Yasu?"

I crossed my arms, ignoring the derisive scoff in the background. "Took you long enough. I wasn't a very good Neji."

And then Rui-sensei descended on us like a mother bird defending her chick from a vulture.


	9. Intent - Part 2

Hanabi kept her hands clasped in front of her until I was within feet of her. Then she dropped her polite, respectful act and threw herself at my legs. I blinked down at her as she claimed my left leg as her own, giggling to herself. I looked to Neji for help, but he only gave Hanabi a quick, dismissive glance and took a step closer to the babysitter.

She was in Natsu's place under the shade of the tree the farthest away from the crowd pouring out of the Academy. She barely started to smile when Neji spoke.

"Where's Natsu?"

I coughed into my fist to hide a rogue smile and glanced away when Neji's shoulders stiffened, finding a sudden interest in the cracked bark of the tree when he gave me a hard glare.

The babysitter leaned forward a little, her eyes on the ground. "I'm sure if she could, she would apologize profusely for this," she dipped lower, her body almost at a ninety-degree angle. "Master Hiashi wanted to have a word with her, and it seems to have run longer than expected. I was sent in her place for today."

My blood turned to ice. What did Hiashi want with Natsu? I glanced at Neji, but he was already turning away so the babysitter wouldn't see his expression, jamming his hands in his pockets to hide his clenched fists. Did Hiashi find out about Hanabi coming over? I would be more surprised if Hiashi didn't know about that by now. Or could it be about us? Dread curled around my heart, like a snake strangling a mouse. I didn't want to think about it, but I remembered those cold, detached eyes of his as he activated Father's seal and watched his own brother roll around on the floor in agony.

"Up!"

I stared down at Hanabi, startled out of the memory. For a second, I saw those frigid eyes looking up at me. Her arms were raised. Her wide smile was suddenly taunting, as if she was saying: _Guess what? Soon, I'll have the power to bring you to your knees with a flick of my wrist whenever I want!_

How long would it be before she learned how to use the seal? Before she had my life in her hands? My breath hitched and I took a step back, wanting, no _needing_ to put space between me and Hanabi. I only remembered that she was sitting on my foot when I tipped backwards, her weight putting me off balance. I twisted automatically to brace my fall, but stopped halfway when Hanabi's fingers dug into my leg as she tried to hold on. Squishing Hanabi under me sounded like as much of a good idea as breathing fire on her.

I fell awkwardly on my side, wincing as my left shoulder banged against the ground, sending a bolt of pain down my arm. The babysitter gasped like she was watching the world end and swiftly rescued Hanabi, clutching the crying toddler to her chest. I wondered what Hiashi would do when he found out about this. I was in the middle of imagining an angry mob of main house members with pitchforks and torches circling our house when a hand appeared in front of me. I blinked at it, and then up at the owner. There was a question that I didn't want to answer in Neji's eyes. I didn't miss the deep, relieved sigh in the background, or the sound of Hanabi's muffled sniffs.

I considered my options. I could take Neji's hand and accept his price, or I could stay on the ground and refuse to get up until the babysitter decided that Hanabi didn't need me anyway and left. I wasn't sure how I felt about Hanabi anymore. Fear came to mind first. By her fourth birthday, would she know how to use the seal? She could learn it later today, and I would never know until she used it on me. I couldn't pretend that I wasn't terrified of Hanabi. I wanted to think that the clan wouldn't trust a three-year-old with that kind of power, but I couldn't be sure. For all I knew, they would teach it to Hanabi early to see if she could handle the weight of that responsibility.

Guilt followed. Hanabi was the one who taught me that I could still be a kid in a clan that expected me act like an adult, and I was treating her like this? She wasn't one of the elders, who knew exactly what they were doing when they forced the seal on me. She had broken every single unspoken rule when she came to our house, because she didn't know any better. She wouldn't do that to me.

Would she?

And layers and layers below that, simmering in a black pit of resentment and envy, was hate. I could still see Hanabi's taunting smile, even though I knew I imagined it. I hated her a little more every time she reminded me of Hiashi, making me feel even guiltier.

I focused on Neji's hand again. But if I stayed like this, people would stare, and I could already hear the civilians whispering to each other. _First, her brother had that public meltdown, and now this? Don't they have any pride?_ Plus, I didn't completely trust my and Neji's ability to find our way back to the compound on our own. Natsu took the same route every day, but a lot of the roads looked the same. And knowing Neji, we'd disagree on which way to go eventually.

I sighed lightly as I took Neji's hand and let him pull me up. I was barely upright when I felt his thumb against my palm.

 _What was that?_

I should have stayed on the ground.

 _I overreacted,_ I wrote back on the back of his hand. He looked unsatisfied with that answer. I drew a line through the imaginary words and tried again with, _Hanabi is heavier than she looks._ I drew another line through it a second later. Even written, it felt off and flat.

I didn't want to think about what made me react like that to Hanabi any more than I had to, but I owed Neji a straight answer. I settled with: _She has Hiashi's eyes._ I stepped back, expecting to see hate in his eyes. I even expected him to turn and walk away at the mere mention of Hiashi so the babysitter wouldn't see.

He didn't do any of that. Instead, he looked at Hanabi, and I saw understanding in his eyes. It wasn't a basic understanding, like he understood the idea, but a _deep_ understanding, like he knew exactly what I meant.

More than that, I was surprised that he was letting me see it. It wasn't often that Neji showed anyone that he could feel more than anger, and hate.

* * *

I had a sneaking suspicion that we were lost.

I squinted hard at a tree that looked suspiciously like the one we passed a few minutes before, complete with the U-shaped groove in the bark and the glint of something metal lodged under one of the roots. The babysitter was ahead of us, Hanabi squeezing her fingers as she walked next to her. She hadn't looked at me since her near-death experience earlier.

I had never been to this part of Konoha before. Natsu always led us through the busiest part of the village. I was used to the low-buzz of conversation as vendors were haggled with in the market, the sound of laughing and yelling as younger kids entertained themselves by playing tag or ninja. But now it was quiet, with the only sound being the occasional rustle from a squirrel in the bushes, or the wind. She never said it, but I knew Natsu chose to go that way to help us get used to being outside the clan for long periods of time.

I moved closer to Neji, lowering my voice to a whisper. "I bet 60 ryo that we pass that tree again." I wasn't sure how much longer I could walk in silence and pretend that I was still entertained by the sound of my sandals hitting the dirt.

Neji turned to look at said tree, then gave me a deadpan stare. "You don't have any money."

I raised an eyebrow at him. "So, you're saying that you think you would lose?"

His eyes lit up at the challenge. He glanced at the tree again, as if he might take on the bet anyway with our imaginary money. Then he shook his head, shaking off the threat of playfulness creeping up on him like a duck shaking off water. "I'm _saying,_ " he emphasized. "That it's pointless."

I huffed. "You should live a little, I hear it's fun."

Neji's eyes shot to mine, and I felt a small sense of victory at getting his attention again. "How is betting on a tree 'living'?"

I smiled and was about to answer when I caught part of a symbol carved into the tree behind him as we walked past it. It was a paper fan, with a curved line etched through the middle. _Uchiha._ I felt an itch started to form in my brain as several pieces clicked into place. The lack of anything around me. The fact that I'd never been here before. The isolation-

I walked face first into something hard. I stumbled back in a daze, sure that Neji would never let me live down the moment I walked straight into a tree. Then I noticed that the tree had legs. I saw a second pair of feet step up next to the first, and couldn't help but tense as laughter erupted above me. Of all the things to run into, it had to be an Uchiha. I would have felt less embarrassed if I tripped into a bush.

"Sheesh, Itachi. I know you have a talent for being invisible and all, but this is another level. You stopped walking, and she _still_ didn't see you until it was too late."

My eyes widened at the name, but everything after that was drowned out by the sudden roar in my ears. I jerked my head up, darting from Itachi—who looked just as, if not more, embarrassed—to the boy standing next to him, holding a stick of dango. _Shisui._ He wasn't laughing anymore, but instead silently stared down at me, his eyes curious.

I never had much of a reason to think of the Uchiha Massacre before. It was always there in the back corner of my mind, gathering dust as more important events took the stage. Like what I promised Neji, or the Hyūga Affair. I turned my stare back to Itachi, who still wouldn't look at me. But now it was all I could think about. By the end of next year, Shisui would be dead. And the year after that, the Uchiha clan would be slaughtered.

In the background, I saw the babysitter's outline as she dropped into a low bow, apologizing profusely on my behalf. Itachi half-turned to look at her, assuring her that he didn't mind, but Shisui was still staring at me, locking me in place with his eyes. His left elbow was on Itachi's shoulder, his right absently twirling the dango stick.

I could still hear a faint echo of the Hyūga in me, insisting that I got a hold of myself and stare back until he looked away first. But all I could think was: _A lot of people are going to die because of them._ Even without the sharingan, it felt like Shisui could see into my head, and was slowly picking my thoughts apart. I was slammed with the abrupt fear that he _knew_ , as if he could see his future just by looking at me.

"Hmm." He stopped twirling the stick. "Have something you want to say, little Hyūga?"

Even Itachi's attention was brought back to me at that. He studied me for a second, then looked up at Shisui, a question in his eyes. I quickly averted my gaze instead of answering, staring at the grass, the trees, anywhere but directly at him. It was the wrong move, but I couldn't stop myself.

I waited for Shisui to figure it out, for canon to collapse around me like a piece of paper being crumpled up and thrown away, but instead I felt fingers curl around my wrist. I tensed as I lifted my head, staring at Neji with wide eyes. He was standing between me and Shisui, somehow managing to glare at both of them at once. "Uchiha," he said tightly, using the same tone he normally only broke out for those in the main house.

Shisui bit off the last of the dango as he stared at him, but his eyes weren't as heavy as they were when he was looking at me. Neji didn't back down, squeezing my wrist.

"We really should be going," the babysitter cut in nervously before Neji learned how to glare them into imploding. She didn't move closer, standing out of range of the sparks flying between them. She kept a firm grip on Hanabi, who peeked out from behind her to watch.

"We should too," Itachi joined the conversation for the first time, directing a pointed look at Shisui.

Shisui blinked innocently back at him, breaking the staring contest. Neji took that as defeat by default and pulled me out of the line of fire, forcing me to walk with him. The babysitter exhaled in relief, but I barely heard it. I could still feel Shisui's stare on my back, see his knowing smile as his question bounced around my head.

 _Have something you want to say, little Hy_ _ū_ _ga?_

I closed my eyes. I forgot that Neji was holding my hand until we neared the compound and he let go, leaving me feeling cold and alone.


End file.
